3 ways to recover when someone has betrayed your trust deliberately

3 ways to recover when someone has betrayed your trust deliberately

I’ve been through situations in my life where I have been let down by people. We all have and if we’re honest, we have let people down too. It happens because human beings aren’t perfect and are prone to mistakes. But in this short post, I will be giving advice about dealing with people who haven’t made a mistake, but who intentionally tried to use you – toxic people who have no interest in you as a person whatsoever,  but have just hung around for personal gain. And these people could be anywhere – in your relationships, social circles, work…

1. Believe what happened

You may have seen the warning signs but you chose to ignore them because the person was so nice – but they are a con artist. It’s a horrible thing that’s happened but it did happen as unbelievable as it seems. Just because YOU wouldn’t do such a thing, it doesn’t mean another person wouldn’t. So let it sink in, process it and understand that yes, this person has actually taken advantage of you and you fell for it.

2. Let the person go
Once they’ve been rumbled, this person will try to stay in your life and persuade you that you misunderstood everything. Don’t fall for it. Once they realise that you know exactly who they are, they may even turn quite nasty. Just move on. A part of you may even miss the person. It was someone you trusted, someone that you thought cared about you, someone that you spent time with, laughed with… But it’s not the person you are missing, it’s the IDEA of that person because the person you are actually missing isn’t even real. And part of moving on is letting go of any ill feelings you have towards the person because the longer you hold on, the longer you will be hurting.

3. Don’t beat yourself up
Once it’s sunk in, you will then probably go through all those feelings of self-critisism – like I did when it happened to me. “How could you be so stupid? Why didn’t I see it coming?”

Avoid thinking about it all the time. You’ve already understood what happened to you, so now let it go. Focus your mind on helpful, positive things instead.

Remember, THEY decided to be like that – it’s not your fault. Just learn to watch out for the signs next time.

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